Feb
1
I was shocked when my brother suggested me to stress on my boyfriend to have a HIV test. Well, there was nothing to be shocked about. Sex is such an obvious act, the most genuine way to express love. But how come such situations evolved where we just cannot trust our own self of being sexually fit?
Should a pre-marital HIV testing be considered as a rational need?
Some people may stress that there is so much belief and faithful partnership convictions in one wife, one husband system of India and there are not the trends of multiple sexual partners in the Indian society hence HIV may not have an effect on India in a considerable way. Added to that, because of the long tradition, heritage culture and values the Indian society is self-preserving against AIDS….So they thought they could shun AIDS epidemic. But the AIDS is becoming an epidemic anyhow.
Trust me, all such beliefs and faiths in truthfulness of monogamy are redundant.
First of all, HIV infection is not at all a problem of sex-alone. HIV can be spread through via various ways. Already, AIDS is a big problem in India in lower class streams, and the specific stream of truck drivers. Prostitution in India is illegal, which creates more vulnerability of the oppressed women forced to be engaged in prostitution, as they in no-way can demand proper safety rights from their clients, pimps and police. So, even if prostitutes know the necessity of condoms and protections against STD’s they just cannot force the clients, some of them give in to clientele who refuse to use condoms.
The Indian Middle class convictions about AIDS as it is some other’s problem can be a dangerous sign. Specialists already claim that HIV and AIDS have moved further than the high risk groups in India. They are in the general population.
Furthermore, the attitude towards AIDS in India is very unhealthy, and even if some hospital signifies a patient as a HIV infected, it is tried to be hidden about despite the risk that someone could carry on infecting others. The argument for this is, people have been ostracized and driven to commit suicide over AIDS tests results, plus the reliability of the tests is not very much. The “Don’t tell Policy” can be a real danger in India yet it is pertinent. Even doctors discriminate against HIV patient. Last year some cases happened in Delhi and Kolkatta where doctors denied treating the poor patients just because they were infected with AIDS.
As a matter of fact, AIDS has already taken a plunge beyond red-light-areas and gloomy highway Dhaba’s to middle class houses. Now out of 10 AIDS patients one is a housewife i.e 10% female patients of AIDS are housewives of middle or lower middle class, an indication of just how alarming the spread is. Premarital sex cannot be denied nor can it be checked. Despite all shaggy faiths and belief system, it is highly improbable to shut eyes and accept that Indian middle class is safe, in reality; I feel that the middle class is more vulnerable to HIV then others and when middle class people can stress on horoscope matching, why cannot they accept for pre-marital HIV testing? I am sure that is more necessary. Being a HIV infected is surely much more dangerous then being a manglik isn’t it?
Yet, will a demand for pre-marital HIV testing help? What if the male/female gets engaged in a post-marital outside sex relation and gets the virus?
Basically, I am not against pre-marital or outside marriage sex-relations too. Yet, the sense of security and safety must be there, and demand for a HIV test will at least make it a point that the girl and the boy both are aware of the dangers involved in being irresponsible. I won’t say AIDS is a threat, yet to be reasonably alert against AIDS is rational.
There are many things which need to be changed, as for example, prostitution must be legalized so that the prostitutes can demand security and medical safety with openness and may get beneficial options too, the gup-chup sex must be avoided by the middle class and sex must be taken as a valid open subject. The general bad feeling of middle class against open talks on sex must be avoided and most importantly, the ostracizing tendency against the HIV patients should be removed anyhow.
Yet, it will be valid first step, if the girls and boys start asking for a pre-marital HIV testing rather than matching horoscopes.
http://couplewriters.blogspot.com/
29 Responses to “Pre-Marital HIV Testing or Matching Horoscope?”
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Vinodh Says:
February 1st, 2008 at 5:36 pmi actually feel that the move has come a bit late..but its never too late!
India has been hesitant to take strict action against aids for long…
hvin to undergo a HIV test is no sin and should not be avoided…its probably the best way to get the growth rate of AIDS patients under a control…
Good post!
Jshree Says:
February 1st, 2008 at 5:40 pmthough i do not completely relate to your views on pre-marital sex, i do agree on your point that HIV testing must be done before marriage. Good post.
suar Says:
February 1st, 2008 at 7:38 pmhaving the test done, is definitely a sensible way to deal with growing aids patients..
sensible post on a sensible topic..
-keep posting..
suren Says:
February 1st, 2008 at 10:30 pmif monogamy had been staunchly followed we wouldn’t the nation with second highest AIDS patients and well said … if at all the test can bring some good it could be the awareness and a sense of security, nothing more.
Anonymous Says:
February 2nd, 2008 at 11:06 amWell one need not see whether we are from low risk or least risk group….HIV and Hepatitis B tests need to be done by all before marriage. Vaccination against Hep B is not a sure protection.
Rahul Chandra (Saraswat)
Swarnadeep Chatterjee Says:
February 2nd, 2008 at 9:43 pmI am still a minor.
temporal Says:
February 3rd, 2008 at 6:33 amyou have expressed your thoughts sincerely
here is another take LINK on my blog and also on Desicritics
if you want to bring this there (on Desicritics) write to me
thanks
t
Net Esportes Says:
February 3rd, 2008 at 7:00 amIt is essential to make the tests today, the pra not trust anyone else?!
cookie™ Says:
February 4th, 2008 at 11:34 amha ha!
a parental advisory on the top would do!
just kidding.
Infact people need to be educated and that too BIGTIME..
Makes me wanna write on this too..
cheers
keep blogging!
Benji Says:
February 4th, 2008 at 11:35 pmHIV testing has a lot of ethical, moral, medical and social issues attached to it. marriages are built on love and trust. A couple share their past anbd future and anyone who truly loves and cares and has made mistakes in the past will share. Testing should be mutual and not out of law
Me Says:
February 5th, 2008 at 12:53 am@benji
It is not at all necessary to commit a mistake for getting HIV infection.
One may get that infection just because the dentist he visited was not sincere enough and used undistilled and infected tools.
One may get infected because of a barbers mistake, or may be because of a doctor’s, nurse, wardboy’s, hospitals mistakes!
To have a HIV test before making any sexual relation is quite genuine.
and I never talked of law, I talked of genuinity of HIV test and why it is necessary.
Any compulsory law is obviously not OK.
Yet, any rational step is genuine.
The Terabithian Blue Phoenix Says:
February 5th, 2008 at 7:28 pmYour post was quite sensible, but the first paragraph confused me. I’d like to understand that better.
Unfortunately, we live in a country where people want to keep everything taboo. In Kolkata there have been numerous protests AGAINST basic sex education. So I try to keep my hope (that people will understand) considerably low.
You never mentioned pre-marital sex equals to unfaithful relations. But some of your readers have assumed that. Pity….
subramaniamthinks Says:
February 5th, 2008 at 8:08 pmDaring Topic but you have handled it Excellently by throwing various valid points..
Gr8..
Lionel Says:
February 7th, 2008 at 6:14 pmppl should indeed fo for an hiv test …….
the number of hiv+ patients are increasing and more and more number of ppl are falling prey to dis ….
S Ramanathan Says:
February 9th, 2008 at 11:48 pmindeed, it will be a wonderful first step. but, i guess we have to simplify our approach to sex and sex-related issues first. we have to change the way we look at these problems and then look for the solution.
Ayesha Says:
April 4th, 2008 at 4:46 pmUnited Nations-Millennium Development Goals. This might interest you…
Malaria, together with HIV/AIDS and TB, is one of the major public health challenges undermining development in the poorest countries in the world. Many children who survive an episode of severe malaria may suffer from learning impairments or brain damage.
This will help all you people on this blog to do something along with the United Nations in your locality.
Check this
http://www.orkut.com/Community.aspx?cmm=47234928
Global Voices Online » India: Should Pre-Marital HIV Testing Be Mandatory? Says:
July 19th, 2008 at 7:32 pm[...] Reason for Liberty comments that this policy could be a valid first step, especially since HIV has now made its way into India's middle class. Pre-martial HIV testing [...]
Indian Insurance system and Free Market | Reason for Liberty Says:
July 21st, 2008 at 11:40 am[...] [...]
Global Voices ग्लोबल वायसेज़ हिन्दी में » भारत : क्या एचआईवी Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 6:55 pm[...] लिबर्टी ने टिप्पणी दी है कि यह कानून पहला सही कदम हो सकता है विशेष रूप से इस लिए भी चूंकि [...]
annnnnn... Says:
April 28th, 2009 at 5:18 pmI wld first of all like 2 giv complements 2 the author 4 putting forward such a relevent or essential thought ….dis is very useful stuff 4 saving various lifes frm getting ruined
ThanK u
crystal Says:
May 12th, 2009 at 1:07 amI totally agree if the guy really loves you but you don’t want to wait stress to have him tested for H.I.V
Governments, Sex-Ed and Religion | Reason for Liberty Says:
September 18th, 2009 at 7:41 pm[...] culture and religion. Irrespective of the fact that India is facing a huge trouble in the face of HIV and other STDs, and it is the nation with extreme numbers of cases of child molestation, rapes and unwanted [...]
shunq shunq Says:
November 26th, 2009 at 8:39 pmeww tht ez a gross image disgusseding
Claire Says:
November 30th, 2009 at 11:55 amThis is a thoughtful post on the need to get tested, even if you trust your partner. Interestingly, In India, as in sub-Saharan Africa, it is not the poorest who have the highest risk of being infected with HIV. The most reliable source of information on this is the DHS surveys, which show that in India by 2006, the people who are in the top 40% of the population in terms of wealth have a higher prevalence than the poorest (who presumably, are the lower class streams). the DHS report is found here http://www.measuredhs.com/pubs/pdf/FRIND3/12Chapter12.pdfand the figures from that report are as follows:
Wealth group HIV Prevalence
poorest 0.27%
second poorest 0.25%
middle 0.28%
second richest 0.43%
richest 0.18%
the second richest are by far those most at risk from HIV in India.
There are other interesting results presented in this report, on caste, religion and education.
DHS are internationally recognised comparable large-scale household surveys.
Claire
Conservative Indian Says:
December 15th, 2009 at 8:52 amCouldn’t agree less on the importance of HIV-testing. But, Two things:
(1)I don’t quite understand why it has to be pitched against Horoscope matching.
These two checks, if you will, are there (for people who believe in horoscopes) to indicate two totally different things. Horoscope matching is more about how compatible two people are; while HIV-testing is more about how long it could be before one of them, or both, die due to HIV. In some sense, it perhaps a quality vs a quantity argument, both are perhaps important; and (even if one doesn’t think so) one cannot replace the other.
(2) Second, while I do agree that one solution is for people to give up on their traditional morals, and social taboos and become more talkitive in these matters in order to keep in touch with the laws/globalization. But, perhaps that is not the only solution
Perhaps, legalsing (and perhaps encouraging .. lol) child-marriages could allow the middle-class conservative society, who might feel it a taboo to talk about sex outside the marriage, to both prevent HIV and keep up with their morals.
I know this might sound as a ridiculous idea …. (may be it is, or may be not) .. it is definitely not any more ridiculous than legalising prostitution for the benefit of the prostitutes .
Moreover, if it is acceptable under (followed, if not the written) law for two teenagers to have sex without
their parents permission …. why should it be a crime/taboo to have the parents consent to the affair and legitimise it as a marriage?
Thoughts/comments are welcome
Unpretentious Diva Says:
December 15th, 2009 at 9:06 amWell dear, it is my personal belief that Horoscope matching is a sham and actually a disgusting fashion. I even would like to support conservatives like Maharishi Dayanand and whole Arya Samaj faculty that keep trying to help the society get rid of such superstitions.
But, again I am a libertarian, so I do respect an Individual’s right to believe in any sort of superstition, they can surely match horoscope, I am not saying that government should state some other “Dictatorial Law” to prohibit Horoscope Matching.
Yet, in my personal view, horoscope matching is futile superstition while HIV test may prove to be handy and useful, and that is the theme of the article, an article in opposition to a certain kind of superstition and in support of a positive scientific test that may save people from spreading a disease.
That doesn’t mean that I want to argue with others about the authenticity of horoscopes, if they like matching it, they may, if they check for HIV test too alongwith horoscope matching, it will be worthy.
And well, you never mentioned the second point. May be you missed it.
Conservative Indian Says:
December 15th, 2009 at 9:52 amI do respect your belief/opinion, whatever it may be, irrespective of weather or not they agree with me.
However, as much as your article does to highlight the salient features of HIV-testing, your content does not have anything to do with horoscope matching. So, I guess they could rather be spoken separately.
(I posted the second part of the comment also, hope you can find it).
aisyah Says:
September 11th, 2010 at 2:42 amYou are a writer with a very good analysis, some i agree but some of your opinion was very Dis Agreeable..
” about making the prostitution to be legal…”
emm…let me ask you to think..how do you feel…..?????
if you have a daughter and a son and how if they said someday…
daughter :”mama..i want to work as a prostitute..it seem to be interesting..”
boy ; “mama…i was from that prostitute, she is hot..can i go there again tomorrow..”
—-we will be destroying our kids ethics, this is not only about HIV but more than that…may God SAve my family and your family..amin..:)—