Comments on: Dowry- The Other Facet

By: nn

nn — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 20:11:32 +0000

A friend of mine just got back from Cambodia where he had to visit all the different women vying for his hand in marriage. I was really bothered by all this because my friend is Homosexual and had yet to tell his family, due to being scared of disgracing them. So now he is married has accepted a dowry and I can’t be friends with him. I am upset at his ability to deceive this girl to appease his family. I think some cultures need to adjust to the times.

By: Legal or Illegal : Prostitution | Reason for Liberty

Legal or Illegal : Prostitution | Reason for Liberty — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 13:47:17 +0000

[...] point obliged to return sexual favours. Having a marital contract does not changes anything because if you don’t have sex with your spouse then that can become a grounds for cancellation(divorce) or…. A voluntary trade benefits both the parties, take for example a milkman gives a baker his milk, [...]

By: Feminism versus Ifeminism | Reason For Liberty Blog

Feminism versus Ifeminism | Reason For Liberty Blog — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 16:56:14 +0000

[...] against the woman as an Individual. No one can deny that extreme crimes such as Honour Killing, dowry deaths, violence against women, rapes, sexual harassment is a burning problem. Yet the question, which [...]

By: Mohammad Khairul Alam

Mohammad Khairul Alam — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:38:58 +0000

Seminar arranged by Rainbow against Dowry

“Dowry is a social malady that degenerates the self-dependent mentality of the men. Apart from that, the custom hinders a good relationship between the provider and receiver of dowry, and as a result, creates problems between families and within the society. Each year this custom costs a large number of women their life while it causes many other women to live a degraded life”- this was the speech from chief guest Mr. R Jamir, Director of MATADOR, at the seminar arranged by Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kalyan Foundation against the dowry custom. Mr. Md. Sohel Alam, the representative from the Qatar Charity Found, Rashal Md. Iqbal Khan the Representative from the PKSF were also present at the seminar as the special guest. Director of Rainbow Md. Altaf Hossain Mahabul read the main article at the seminar. Amongst others who presented their speeches on the occasion were social workers like Mr. Mahbub Alam, Md. Mizanur Rahaman Scientific Officer of PPRC, Mohammad Khairul Alam Executive Director of Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation and Kazi Nafiza Shultana Chairman of Rainbow. People from different levels of the community participated in the seminar from the areas of Lalbagh, Hajaribagh and Kamrangirchar.

By: Ruchi Sharma

Ruchi Sharma — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 14:59:56 +0000

When dowry becomes an obligation, it becomes a danger.

By: Freesoul

Freesoul — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 03:17:00 +0000

@pururendu

the article is Morally correct and signifies that Indian law system is wrong.

By: Purnendu

Purnendu — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 18:42:31 +0000

The article would have been better if you have checked with the legal aspects and tried to remain legally correct. Anyway, a nice one from you.

By: renegade_division

renegade_division — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 14:57:21 +0000

In simple black and white, if a money is paid with a commodity in a voluntary exchange then the supply greatly overweights demand.
So if women are being given with a bunch of money that means there is more demand for good men. Since no value can be added to women other than what they naturally have, so their looks were compensated with dowry.

Even today, I hear something like this(this actually happened), we were looking for a guy for my cousin, and this one lady who happened to be the mother of a prospective groom, said on phone without even looking at anything about the girl:
“We need 5 tola gold, a Maruti Car, 10 pair of clothes for groom, one Cabinet(Almirah), 3 Safari Suits, Rs 1 Lakh in cash and if the girl has some problems(khot) then the demand can go up too”
Well my mom told her “I have 5 young rajput guys in my family, all of them engineers, all of them of unmarried, two are working in Bangalore, one is working in Calcutta, my own son is in America, and my other son is studying in Manipal”
She replied “Lets just make it with the Car then, shall we?”

By: shradha

shradha — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 11:09:11 +0000

Hey!
good issue raised!
keep writing!

By: suren

suren — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 08:06:42 +0000

hey i have read somewhere that even in some indian system there used to be a practice of men giving dowry to marry women.. my personal opinion is that dowry, as a system, had evolved to prevent the outflow of capital from the family system given the fact that marriage used to be within the joint family… but as systems and institutions changed it has led to the present situation of dowry being a demon !

By: samay

samay — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 21:12:25 +0000

Dowry system

Dowry system is undoubtedly becoming one of the biggest curse of the modern Indian society. A custom that we carry forth when the rationales behind them have diluted and degraded.

The rational reason that I see for the origin of dowry system in Vedic society (which was indeed a very rational society) was the right of inheritance. In ancient times, the daughter once married off, never used to return to her parent’s home. She used to travel to distant land to dwell with the family of her husband. Since she was not expected to return, the legitimate share of the family wealth was given to the daughter at the time of marriage. Marriage was believed to be beginning of a new grahasti (family) by two individual and the girls share of wealth was given to the man for the simple reason that in ancient time man was the creator and maintainer of wealth or simply put the bread winner.

Misnomer that this wealth is being given as a guarantee for the daughter being kept well has crept into the social consciousness later, which of course has resulted in vice versa phenomenon of daughter not being kept well if the dowry is less. Such a social sanction has made dowry a ransom that brides father pays to the groom.

Concept of making wealth from a marital relationship never existed in Vedic scheme of things. In Vedic precepts of marriage, the bride and the groom must be of equal stature intellectually, in accomplishments and in stature. It in fact advises men not to marry from a family that is too rich as compared to his and not vice versa thereby undermining dowry as a criterion for marriage.

Greed has however taken toll on the system and people are looking to get rich in the shortest possible way. Money matters no matter how it comes. Existence and acceptance of such concept of wealth in the mind of the individual itself is a moral corruption according to me.

Changes in society and Role of women

The concept of dowry further dilutes with the changing role of women in the society she is no more a financial burden on the man and men are no more the sole bread winner. In such a situation if dowry is given by the brides side equal amount must be contributed by the grooms side as well into the new family.

Dwelling further is there a need for anyone to contribute, if parents have made their kids able and competent to work and earn their living in the world they have ideally done their job. They must not be asked to part with their wealth for it is for them to enjoy. They have the legitimate right to give that wealth to whomsoever they wish to after their death through a will. The concept of dowry thus has become redundant and a menace in the modern society.

By: siddharth ranjan

siddharth ranjan — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 18:35:38 +0000

Once again a good theme reduced to black and white by Gargi, in her inimitable style.
Summary:
we ought to give more credence to the existing legal system of the country and should solemnize marriages in court of law rather than at religious altars and the Marriage should be well defined by an exhaustive contract.
women have to stand united to prevent atrocities against their lot and all unjust demands and exploitations should be appropriately opposed.